I am Fat :'(

‘You’re a panda! He’s a panda! What u gonna do big guy? Sit on me?’ . I hope everyone remembers this line as well as me. Said by Tai Lung to cute Po , when he realized that Po was the Dragon Warrior. Well what happened next was just what lung asked for. Po did sit on him before giving the Wushi Finger hold. So the real question here is , did being fat ever come in the way of Po’s greatness.

Here , there and everywhere, people I know are majorly concerned about how fat they have become(most of these people aren‘t really fat). Being fat has it’s own advantages. Look at Po , he got trained into being a hero just because of his need for food. So why are people so concerned that they are becoming fat? It’s not that u won’t get clothes of your size.

Some people might reason that chicks don’t dig fat guys or vice versa. Well , all I have to say love is blind and knows no bar. Like personally I like big butts and I don’t know y? Like look at our own Mota , he’s doing brilliantly. An epic love story of shrek is good enough to show that I babe like Fiona can fall for an fat ogre.

Infact I think fat people who have made peace with the fact that they are fat are much better off than thin ones. What better example than our own Vijay Malya, he’s fat, drinks beer has awesome cheerleaders and is enjoying his life to fullest. Hugh hefner isn’t really what you would call thin but world’s sexiest babes( the babes you and I would die for) are with him. John Travolta , name one girl who doesn’t think he’s sexy.

Well people might say fat people don’t go well with sports. Arjuna Ranatunga did win the world cup for sri lanka. In WWE when it was decided to publicize a love machine , instead of going for a thin Macho wrestler , they picked a 485 pound Viscera. Ramesh Powar did play for India ( this doesn’t really support anything but still).

All this shows that being fat isn’t really against you . And specially those people who just gain a little weight and start crying over it ,read carefully “ IT’S NOT A BIG DEAL” and you definitely don’t need to stop eating or continue cribbing about it. It’s not as if , if u start dieting you will end up with a 6 packs. A general trend shows people who are fat don’t really care( Mota, Tauro) and people who aren’t keep crying about it(Yangi, etc.). You would rather eat a fat sub rather than a skimpy burger, wouldn’t you.

So please stop worrying that you are fat, and as long as it’s tasty eat what you get or what you like , irrespective of whether it’s fattening or not, because you never know what the future holds for you. One day , you are sitting at home crying that there is no chicken for dinner and next day you’re in Chennai wondering what are going to eat for the next meal? Another dosa? Oh leave it, what choice do i have? “Anna 1 dosa aur 1 omlette”.

Ps: not meant for people with BMI above 28 . You People need exercise.

The Red Connection

Life is all about building relations and storing memories. Some memories are happy whereas others not so happy. Some incidents stick in the heads of people, while others are comfortably forgotten . Same goes for colors . People tend to remember some colors more than others. Of these red is the color that sticks in the head for the longest time. In fact, it is one of the most fascinating colors ,and also most ironical color.

Red is the color of heart , the symbol of love. On eve of Valentine’s day the whole world shines in red. Anyone whose ever been in love will definitely know the significance of red rose(especially the ones who have helped me pluck roses from rose garden). Red cross for world health. Red ribbon for anti aids . Red is the feeling of warmth. Even Blood orchids , the mythical flowers which give eternal life are supposedly red.

The same red color is the sign of immense danger. It represents gore. Gamers will understand this more than others , because in any game shooting down zombies with red blood gives more satisfaction than killing zombies with blood of other color(House of Death). “Ring ring ringaaa….” Well we are all very familiar with the red light districts and I do hope none of us have memories from there. In fact our beloved satan is symbolized by red color.

Let’s move slightly apart , into comic world. Magneto , Spiderman , Flash all are dressed in red. No one can forget the red underwear Superman wears. In fact the strongest abilities in any anime is shown by red . The sharingan, Tsukoyumi, susano , senbonzakura . This shows that red signifies power and ability to lead. Even our own Indian superhero Shaktiman(fck fck fck fck fck ) is dressed in red. On contrary even vampires have red eyes and so do people with conjunctivitis.

What is amazing is to see that apart from the facts above , if we look back on our lives ,even we intend to remember the color red more significantly when compared to any other color. I doubt anyone whose seen a chicken being chopped off will ever forget it. Or anyone, whose ever given a red rose, irrespective of it being accepted or not will forget the incident. Anyone can forget bolt , but I doubt sharad ever will . After all he did see red blood, courtesy bolt . How many people remember the umbrella you carry?? Ask nupur , she will remember the “Khooni chata” she had , not coz it was pink but because the two of us got cuts in our fingers while doing the same thing with it , that too within an interval of 15 minutes. I doubt harsh will ever forget the night when he went home at one and told his dad that I had cut my leg into two halves and was bleeding(to death). There are people at an age of 22,who still can’t watch movies with blood in it because it gets stuck to their head and they keep getting disgusted by it.(I will not disclose names here).

One color that joins us all, friend ,foes or even family is red. One color that maps the extremes in life. Red marks joy in our life, brings love to us and the same red shows pain and danger. If we avoid the red connection , I guess half our happiness and half sorrows will be gone. Why live a halflife? Embrace red (does not mean you skip a red light tomorrow) and enjoy what it brings with it.

Ps: I forgot tomato ketchup, sorry mota.